How Can We, Imperfect People, Live the Way Jesus Wants Us to Live? (Mark 9:19–24)

Jesus is never unsettled by our imperfections. Actually, he is most at ease and hopeful with those who are glaringly imperfect. He dined with hated tax collectors and “champion” sinners (see Mt 9:10). He offered grace to a woman caught in adultery (see Jn 8:3–11). His own disciples—the men hechose—were sometimes dull, fickle and unbelieving (see Mt 15:16; Mk 9:19; 14:66–72). Even in his last hour, as he hung on the cross, Jesus welcomed a criminal into the kingdom (see Lk 23:43).

It seems Jesus sees potential in our imperfection. When we are the most acutely aware of our weakness, we reach the end of our rope. Those who have run out of self-reliance are ready to rely on Jesus to give them new life.

But Jesus is frustrated by dishonesty. He reserved his sharpest words for the religious frauds who did not realize they were in desperate trouble. “It is not the healthy who need a doctor” (Mt 9:12), he told them. So an important step toward living the way Jesus intends is being brutally honest about our radical imperfections. Bringing our sins into his light by giving them a specific name—lust, anger, gossip, gluttony, greed and so on—makes it possible for us to experience deep-soul healing from the Great Physician (see 1Jn 1:8–9).

But the goal is not to merely admit our imperfections and offenses. The goal is to transform our sinful natures by the Spirit of God so that we become the kind of people in whom the life of Jesus is most vividly expressed. Because we are human, imperfections are inevitable. But through Jesus, what’s old can become new (see 2Co 5:17).

Taken from NIV Essentials Study Bible

? (Mark 9:19–24)

Jesus is never unsettled by our imperfections. Actually, he is most at ease and hopeful with those who are glaringly imperfect. He dined with hated tax collectors and “champion” sinners (see Mt 9:10). He offered grace to a woman caught in adultery (see Jn 8:3–11). His own disciples—the men hechose—were sometimes dull, fickle and unbelieving (see Mt 15:16; Mk 9:19; 14:66–72). Even in his last hour, as he hung on the cross, Jesus welcomed a criminal into the kingdom (see Lk 23:43).

It seems Jesus sees potential in our imperfection. When we are the most acutely aware of our weakness, we reach the end of our rope. Those who have run out of self-reliance are ready to rely on Jesus to give them new life.

But Jesus is frustrated by dishonesty. He reserved his sharpest words for the religious frauds who did not realize they were in desperate trouble. “It is not the healthy who need a doctor” (Mt 9:12), he told them. So an important step toward living the way Jesus intends is being brutally honest about our radical imperfections. Bringing our sins into his light by giving them a specific name—lust, anger, gossip, gluttony, greed and so on—makes it possible for us to experience deep-soul healing from the Great Physician (see 1Jn 1:8–9).

But the goal is not to merely admit our imperfections and offenses. The goal is to transform our sinful natures by the Spirit of God so that we become the kind of people in whom the life of Jesus is most vividly expressed. Because we are human, imperfections are inevitable. But through Jesus, what’s old can become new (see 2Co 5:17).

Taken from NIV Essentials Study Bible

2 Timothy 4:7–8

We all want our lives to count for something significant. Like a runner, we want to find a trophy at the finish line—something that leaves a mark on this world and gives our life meaning.

The apostle Paul was in a Roman prison facing death when he gave Timothy this honest appraisal of his own life and ministry. Like a prizefighter, he had made it to the last round. Like a distance runner, he was right at the tape and still in full stride. He expressed great joy in knowing that he had lived his life without compromising his faith in God.

One thing God wants from each of us is our faithfulness. He wants us to remain true to him. If you’re a spiritual explorer, such a life begins by taking the first step: Ask Christ to forgive you and give you direction. Once you do that, Christ will come to live in you. Through the guidance of the Holy Spirit, Jesus will enable you to faithfully complete your life’s race.

A life marked by faithfully walking with God is a life that truly counts. At the end of your life, whatever else you think you’ll look back on—interests, accomplishments, acquisitions—nothing will compare with the satisfaction of knowing that you invested your life in spiritual things that really last. Better to face God confident that you did it his way than any other way.

Taken from NIV The Journey Bible

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Rolling Eyes (Proverbs 30:13)

Disdainful is an appropriate word for describing the disrespectful looks you will get from your children. You may tell them you won’t tolerate it, but they may ignore you. There may even be a day when a smirk or two will be thrown in with their rolling eyes.

If you know it’s coming, you can prepare for it. The best preparation is to make sure you don’t return the look. Doing so will only negate the corrective action you need to take.

Recall how you rolled your eyes at your parents so you can relate to how your child is feeling. As you do so, you will be more understanding of how your child is learning to navigate through this step toward adulthood.

The point we need to extract from Proverbs 30:13 is that these behaviors do happen. We can wish and hope it won’t, but it does, regardless of how sweet they seem as toddlers. Be aware of where your child is in their development. When they hit the eye-rolling stage, simply accept it as another phase you have to work through. Be diligent about it. Don’t let it go unchecked or their defiance might increase.

Parenting Principle

Haughty eyes are expected but not respected.

Points to Ponder

• What looks or glances do you have that affect your family?
• How do you handle these looks with your children?
• How can you prepare for these issues down the road?

Taken from Once a Day Nurturing Great Kids

God Rewards Those Who Honor Him (Psalm 34:9–10)

What does the phrase “fear the Lord” mean? Are we expected to cower with fright in God’s presence or live in continual terror and dread?

Fear in this sense is the appropriate response of rebellious unbelievers who flaunt God’s decrees. Having rejected Almighty God as a merciful Savior, they now face the grim prospect of meeting him only in his role as the holy Judge of the universe. One the other hand, for the beloved children of God—those whose sins have been forgiven by Christ—“fear the Lord” has a different connotation. The idea for believers is that of awe or stunned admiration in the presence of a great and good Creator. The implication is submissive reverence before a loving Lord, to worship God above all other things. It involves, in the words of the passage, the commitment to “seek” him.

Notice that the promise to those who fear the Lord is that all their needs will be met. Or, as God puts it in another place, “Those who honor me I will honor” (1 Samuel 2:30).

God’s Promise to Me

• I meet the needs of those who honor me.
• I make sure my followers have good things.

My Prayer to God

You meet the needs of those who treat you with reverence, Lord. Forgive me for the times I fail to honor you. You are the majestic king of the universe—high and lifted up. As I trust in you, you fill my life with good things.

Taken from Once a Day Bible Promises

Gray is Good (Proverbs 16:31)

Our society doesn’t see gray hair the same way the cultures in Bible times did. In those times, gray hair was a beautiful representation of a wise, elderly and much-respected person.

In our day, it is more of a representation of someone who just slows us down. People don’t listen to the wisdom those with gray hair have attained. Our children will be influenced by our culture to think that same way unless we do something about it. I propose that you expose your children to those who are elderly by putting them in a place where they can hang out together. Older people love to be around children and vice versa. Just their being together will help your child build respect for the elderly. Allowing your child to hear them tell their stories and other incredible life experiences will develop in your child an appreciation for them.

In a world that’s trying to figure out how to make euthanasia legal, let’s help our family develop a healthy understanding of God’s love for the elderly, and make sure we invest in their lives.

Parenting Principle

Respect the elderly. You will be there one day.

Points to Ponder

• What elderly person do you spend time with who has given you wisdom?
• How could you develop more relationships with the elderly?
• Are your children learning to respect and appreciate the elderly?

Taken from Once a Day Nurturing Great Kids

Respecting Others’ Boundaries (Leviticus 19:18)

In the second half of this verse we see “the golden rule”: Treat others as we would want to be treated. Loving others as commanded in Leviticus 19:18 goes beyond just doing good deeds. It also means respecting their choices and the boundaries they set up. We respect their right to tell us no. When we do this, two things happen:

1. Respecting others’ boundaries helps us deal with our selfishness. When we are concerned about protecting others’ freedoms, we work against the self-centeredness that is part of our fallen nature. We become more other-centered. There is no selfish gain in embracing another’s freedom to say no. The gain is that we have grown.

2. Respecting others’ boundaries increases our capacity to care about others. It isn’t difficult to love the “lovable” aspects of others. It’s another task, however, when we encounter another’s resistance, confrontation or separateness. We may find ourselves in conflict or not getting something we might want from the other person. So we learn to be empathic and patient with them, loving them as ourselves (see Galatians 5:14).

Taken from NIV Life Journey Bible

The Need for Respect (Genesis 12:10–19)

Life can present a married couple with tough choices. Do you take the promotion at work if it means traveling with business associates who have no scruples? Do you keep having lunches with your friend of the opposite sex if it makes your spouse uncomfortable? The list goes on.

So it was with Abram and Sarai. Famine in the land put them into crisis: move or die of starvation. So the couple relocated to Egypt to find food. But Abram made some poor choices there. Sarai was so beautiful that she was sure to attract the attention of Egyptian rulers who wouldn’t hesitate to kill Abram to get his wife. So Abram told his wife to say she was his sister. After all, it was partly true; Sarai was his half sister (see Genesis 20:12). And Abram did need to survive for the covenant promises of God to come true, right?

According to the prevailing pattern for women in that era, Sarai had no say about the arrangement. But how do you think she felt about a husband who feared more for his own skin than for hers? Could you trust your spouse after being misrepresented as someone you’re not? That kind of betrayal can drive a wedge between a couple that only widens over time.

In the movie Love Story, Oliver tells his girlfriend, Jennifer, “Love means never having to say you’re sorry.” Maybe that’s what Abram thought after telling a lie about his wife. Sure enough, the Egyptians praised her to Pharaoh, and Sarai was taken into Pharaoh’s palace. But God rescued Sarai out of that difficult situation by afflicting Pharaoh and his family with such serious diseases that Sarai was sent back to her husband—and Abram even got to keep the livestock and servants he had acquired in the process.

One problem with never saying you’re sorry after wronging your spouse is that you are then inclined to repeat your behavior. That’s exactly what happened. Some years later, Abram once more passed off his wife as his sister, this time to Abimelek, the king of Gerar (see Genesis 20). And years after that, Abram and Sarai’s son, Isaac, did the same thing with his wife, Rebekah (see Genesis 26). So one wrong left unresolved between a couple only succeeded in perpetuating the abuse, threatening the very calling of Abram to be the father of many nations.

The poor choices that Abram made affected his marriage and his future. A Christian married couple can learn from Abram’s life that choices have long-lasting ramifications. To deal with poor choices, own up to any misuse or disrespect of each other. Deal openly and quickly with the sin; come clean with each other and the Lord, and ask each other and God for forgiveness. Then resolve not to repeat the offense.

Taken from NIV Couples’ Devotional Bible

Expressing Anger (Numbers 20:2–11)

A young, thirsty lion and an equally thirsty cougar arrived at their usual watering hole at the same time. Immediately, they began arguing about who should drink first.

Their argument quickly escalated into rage, and the animals started clawing at one another. However, the fight was interrupted when the lion and cougar caught sight of vultures circling overhead, waiting for the loser to fall. The thought of being eaten was enough for the lion and cougar to end their fight.

Anger destroys people and relationships. Cain, the son of Adam and Eve, committed the world’s first murder when in anger he killed his brother Abel. Today, jails, hospitals, abuse shelters and divorce courts are filled with the evidence of anger’s destructive power. However, anger itself isn’t bad. Ephesians 4:26 doesn’t condemn anger; rather, it says, “In your anger do not sin.”

Moses knew the consequences of letting anger lead to sin. At age 40, Moses became so angry when he saw an Egyptian beating a Hebrew that he killed the Egyptian (see Acts 7:23–24). Then Moses had to flee for his life, remaining in exile for 40 years (see Acts 7:30). Then, 40 years after Moses led the Hebrews out of Egypt, Moses’ anger got him into trouble again. The wandering Israelites complained bitterly about their thirst to Moses, blaming him for their discomfort and hardships. So God instructed Moses, “Speak to that rock before their eyes and it will pour out its water” (Numbers 20:8). Instead, Moses angrily struck the rock with his staff. That disobedience against God cost Moses entrance into the promised land (see verse 12).

Anger in marriage isn’t wrong. In “Anger and a Good Marriage” (Together in His Grace, Heartlight Magazine, September 19, 2005), Byron Ware says that anger is inevitable, and the healthy expression of it is a testimony to the strength of a marriage. “Relationships that don’t acknowledge or express anger are usually fragile, unstable, and anemic,” he writes. “For anger not to be expressed suggests that the couple isn’t secure enough or the marriage isn’t strong enough to handle disagreement.”

Not expressing anger leads to the stockpiling of bitterness and resentment; it leads to cold shoulders and cold wars. On the other end of the spectrum is out-of-control anger that is expressed through name-calling, profanity, belittling, intimidation, character assassination and even physical violence. Both extremes are costly to a marriage, undermining intimacy and trust. At its most extreme, unrestrained anger can cost one or both partners their very lives.

In a marriage, respect is key to expressing anger. When anger flares, respect will lead to a discussion of the anger rather than one spouse swallowing their anger in silence. Respect will also guide the expression of anger so that actions are kept within boundaries when tempers blaze. Respect leads to spouses treating each other as helpers and advocates, not as adversaries. And when that happens, the vultures retreat and no one gets eaten.

—Nancy Kennedy

Taken from NIV Couples’ Devotional Bible

Honor First (Ephesians 6:2–3)

Honor your father and mother! This is a lost art in our society. Unfortunately, when children become adults they confuse honor with allowing their parents to continue to control them.

To do everything your parents say after you have established your own home doesn’t represent honoring. Honoring is remembering who they are, what they have done for you, respecting them and taking care of them as they age. Too often parents manipulate their children by quoting Ephesians 6:2–3. That’s dishonoring!

Honoring involves helping your parents understand that your home will be established by you, hopefully incorporating many of the principles passed on by them. Honoring them includes making sure they’re not left to fend on their own. You can help them with provisions if they are struggling, and listen to them and gain wisdom from their unique perspective.

We can teach our children by establishing this type of honoring relationship with our parents. As you honor your parents, you will be known as a great son or daughter. The direct promise from God is that you will enjoy an extended lifespan.

Parenting Principle

As you honor your parents, you will be honored.

Points to Ponder

• How well do you understand what honor means?
• How do you honor your parents?
• How will you ensure your children are prepared to establish their own home?

Taken from Once a Day Nurturing Great Kids

Confess (Proverbs 28:13)

Many people don’t feel the need to confess their sins to God. They ignore his prompting to come clean. Solomon reveals the foolishness of such self-delusion. Trying to hide sin from God interrupts and weakens our relationship with him. When you confess what you’ve done and sincerely ask for God’s forgiveness, the distance closes and your relationship heals. God doesn’t put a statute of limitations on sin. Any obstacles you put in the way of your relationship with him remain there until you remove them. However, if you’re sincere about wanting God’s forgiveness, you’ll receive it.

Reflect & Pray:

• How do you show sincerity about wanting God’s forgiveness?
• Do you have unconfessed sin in your life right now? If so, what effect is it having on your relationship with God? On your self-respect?
• How can you set an example for your family in this area?

Taken from NIV Busy Dad’s Bible